Tuesday, December 16, 2008

The anniversary Potato

My girlfriend and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary this last Friday. Can you believe it! I have been dating a girl for an entire year!

Well she came and visited me and brought me 2 presents. A 28 pack of blue, and a potato.

Now your all wondering why I am so excited about the potato. It's been a running joke with us for a while, and I will have to explain.

When most boyfriends buy something for their girlfriends, they get them a flower. A flower to symbolize their love. It is pretty, it smells nice, and its expensive.

Well, after about 3 days it starts to wilt, then it flat out dies. Who the hell wants to put such a limited use and time line on their love. Sure it may smell great at first, and look pretty, but give it a week. That's exactly how all relationships seem to go. They are all flowers at the beginning, then they rot and smell like shit.

So instead, she got me a potato.

Now a potato, while not as visibly attractive, actually will continue to grow while it's in your possession. Unlike the flower that dies, the potato will grow little eyes, to symbolize how your love for this person will continue to grow. Not only that, but look at all the amazing things you can do with a potato! Don't you want your love to be versatile?
mashed potatoes
french fries
baked potatoes
potato pancakes
potato chips
a battery
remove broken light bulbs from sockets
to grow more potatoes
hash browns
home fries
potato salad
potato bread

and the list goes on.

I want my love to be used for a million reasons, and to continue to grow. So if you really love someone, forgo the flowers, get them a potato.

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