Sunday, September 21, 2008

Phrase Evolution

College is a mixing pot of people. You have all ages, races, genders, and usually a good distribution of wealth from their parents. You have the poor kids and the rich kids, all living and studying together. And of course, the biggest problem anyone has with anyone on a college campus, Not the color of their skin, or the way they dress, but if you call it Soda, or Pop. (Btw, it is Soda, Pop is a name for your grandpa, the guy on the rice krispies box, and what happens to a balloon, or the American economy when there is a prick.)

Some kids end up changing their mannerisms to fit their grouping of friends. They then go back home, say Soda, and the lynch mob comes after them. Besides the soda pop scandal, I have noted a different kind of phrase evolution. The adoption of phrases for description.
Recently one of our brothers began saying "thats diesel" and "Look at that diesel blunt". Well now the word "diesel" is a common adjective in the Row house. I myself have gotten a few followers with my saying of "Fuck that game", although I believe I may have picked it up from Shakedown. I am unsure, one of us picked it up from the other.

I find "Fuck that game" to be a great thing to say when you don't want to do something. Fuck that game comes in handy all over the college campus. When someone steals my seat and the only cushion left is the piss cushion, I say "fuck that game" and throw someone out of a chair.

I thought about doing more homework, Fuck that game.

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Sunday, September 14, 2008

Alfred Squares goes off great

Over the summer I met with school officials, as well as my Greek Senate Exec board a few times to discuss events to do this semester. One of the things I came up with was called "Alfred Squares" a knock off of Hollywood squares. We put professors and staff in the squares, and had sororities vs fraternities.

Well let me tell you, the game went off hysterically! For the first try, and being at the rain location, it worked out pretty amazingly. Tons of questions were answered with hysterical remarks, and the crowd went wild. We played a total of 7 matches, which resulted in the sororities winning 4/7. Sadly we couldn't win, even with some easy choices.

I am pretty proud of everyone to get this event off so well, I was happy, and I think the administration and faculty enjoyed it too. If it had been outside I bet it would have been 10x's better, with a bigger showing, but we tried, and still had a great time. Now that everything is already built for it, Hopefully we can do it each year. I know the competitors were having a blast, so hopefully next year we get a more fierce competition to be a square member.

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Sunday, September 7, 2008

Beer Beer the magical fruit

People often are heard singing that interesting song
Beans, beans, the magical fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
So let's eat beans for every meal!

Although I prefer this version myself

Beans, beans, good for your heart,
The more you eat, the more you fart.
The more you fart, the more you eat,
The more you sit on the toilet seat!

Anyways, I came to the realization that, while beans may make you gassy, Beer, and in large quantities, can accomplish the same thing. As a college student I often experience the joy of alcohol, and it usually comes in carbonated can form. And living with 5 other Fraternity guys, we all obviously have a good time. Well, it turns out that sometimes it becomes unbearable.
Anyone living on a college campus already knows, if you eat the food, you will get gas. Combine that with beer and your in for one hell of a raunchy undies-staining surprise. So in commemoration of the effects that beer has on your colon, I decided to write my own little version

Beer beer the magical drink
the more you sip the more you stink
The more you stink, the faster you pound
So let one rip and buy the next round!

Boy, being an alchy sure is fun.

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Monday, September 1, 2008

Quote of the Day

A bit tired today from a long and amazing weekend, so today will merely be a quote.

I am a student Employee at Friendlys, so I often get dumb questions
Me: Hello sir, what can I get you today
Customer: Hmm, I'm not sure, What count as meals?
Me: Anything listed as "Meal deals". The soups are listed here (points to sign) and I am sorry but we do not have a #6
Customer: Ok, can I get chicken tenders and fries
Me: Off of Dining dollars, or CSA?
Customer: as a meal
Me: No, we only have those options for meals.
Customer: well that's dumb, Let me have an order of Cheese sticks
Me: your aware that's not a meal right?
Customer: Why not?
Me: ugh, ok look. This panel here are the ONLY THINGS you can order as a meal. NOTHING ELSE CAN BE A MEAL
Customer: Ohh, well I will have a #6 then
Me: I'm sorry, are you going to college? there is a huge sign eye level that says NO # 6, and I already told you that
Customer: But you said that anything listed up there was a meal
Me: Im going to go in the back, you can wait for someone that deals with morons to come help you

I proceeded to go back to the kitchen and stand around not doing any work for 6 minutes as another person attempted to help the customer. He eventually got a Cheesburger meal, complained how the service sucked, and left.

I fucking HATE people

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